Happy Monday everyone! Was it hard for anyone else to wake up this morning? The infamous morning after the Super Bowl, of course pre-covid, was the day that most people frequently called out of work for. Let me tell y’all, this morning was a struggle to get out of bed. Don’t be fooled though, I didn’t drink a lick of alcohol last night but I did enter into a self-induced food coma shortly after the game ended. Anyways, on to the heart (all the pun intended) of the content today. We are going to shift the love train to ourselves for a minute here. While we are now less than a week away from Valentine’s Day, I wanted to center this blog post around self-love because I truly believe loving yourself fully is how you can, in turn, love others for who they are. I have struggled with this concept for many years as I always had this constant urge to make others feel better. Where are all my people pleasers at?! I was the definition of a people pleaser who would move mountains for my friends, family, acquaintances from school/work, and even complete strangers sometimes. I would put other’s happiness before my own almost like clockwork and didn’t think twice about it. This happened for a long long time until last year when I basically had a reckoning with my health. I realized shortly after that I couldn’t keep up the pretense anymore, I couldn’t consistently put others above myself because I was basically neglecting my own emotions. I didn’t like who I was. I know, cue the drama… but really, I didn’t like who I had become because I had lost almost all the love for myself. I wasn’t happy with how my life was looking (excluding my relationship that brought me joy every single day, I’m not exaggerating) which largely had to do with my attitude and mindset. Now don’t get me wrong, it is a wonderful characteristic to have a big heart for others but never at the expense of yourself and your own health/emotions.
I know y’all have also been surrounded by the social media hype of almost this “self deprecation is trendy” moment that seems to creep around on the internet. Some may think its funny or “on-brand” but it truly isn’t something to always joke about. I have made a conscious effort to cut belittling myself or my efforts, even if it was just in my mind at first. I want to share with you 5 ways that you can also join me in this effort to love yourself whole-heartedly.
- Morning Moments- First on the list is to create your own morning moments that mean something to you. Whether this looks like a meditation, devotion, prayer, or just silent reflection, make this a focal point in your morning routine before your day has to start. For me, I have a little bit everything because that is what works for me. I have tried many different combinations these past few months and I have found that starting with a mini meditation to find my breath and center my thoughts for today is the best way for me to start. Then I choose an intention for the day and work through a devotional. After this, I sit for a few minutes, doesn’t have to be long, to reflect on how yesterday ended and how blessed I am to wake up another day. I strongly urge you to explore a morning moment routine if you have trouble setting yourself up for success that day. It truly doesn’t have to be long I think my morning moments routine takes about 10 minutes tops. This has quickly become one of the best parts of my day and I wake up looking forward to feeling this inner peace before my busy day starts.
- Change is a part of life- I heard in one of my meditations the other day something that really resonated with me. It was the fact that for as many years as life has been created on earth and for the thousands of years that might come after me, there will never be another me. I am the only version of myself and I should embrace my authentic self. This statement struck me very deeply because while it sounds like common sense, when explained from a different perspective, it settled with me in a way that had never before. As we all have experienced in one time of our life or another, change can happen in the blink of an eye. The important thing to remember is that change isn’t the universe switching things up on you but rather change is good and an expected part of life. If we stayed in our comfort zone or in the same pattern for years and years, we’d never evolve. So instead of cursing changes, big or small in life, let’s work on embracing and acknowledging that change is meant to happen. Let’s not let life happen to us, but rather let our life happen. Through realizing change is inevitable and part of life, it has made me less likely to harbor against myself for not being prepared for a change and subsequently, allow to continue loving myself.
- Find a hobby/Explore a passion- If you are reading this blog post then you are quite literally helping me fulfill my hobby and passion project. I never thought I would have the guts to start a blog because I was nervous that others would judge me or even worse that I would judge myself. However, I realized that by letting my negative thoughts drive my actions, I wouldn’t be able to explore this passion project I was excited about. I know many of us are still living our quarantine lives so this particular bullet might be a bit challenging but I highly recommend trying out that little idea that you keep pushing to the back of your head (yes we all do this too) now that we have the time to do so. It doesn’t have to be anything grand, it can be as simple as picking up the book of your shelf that you bought forever ago but never got around to reading it or it could even be trying out that super complex recipe that caught your eye but never had the patience or time to practice it. Stepping out of your comfort zone may seem a little daunting at first however if you never try, it could potentially stop you from doing something you actually fall in love with. Letting your actions shine through naturally will nudge you to loving yourself more.
- Giving gratefulness a chance- The next bullet in my list is to identify 1 thing that you are grateful for per day. I typically do this at night when I’m winding down for the night but this would also be a good step to add into your morning moments routine mentioned above. I’ve also seen others recommend saying 3, 5, or 10 things to be grateful for which I think is admirable however I just stick to 1 because I think if I did more than that every day I would become overwhelmed. Again, doesn’t have to be rocket science, just something that you are grateful for and I try to make it specific to that day (not just repeating the same thing each day). I also try to make sure I’m not too vague in my statement/thought. I wouldn’t think “I am grateful for my mom”. My thought would be more like “I am grateful that I was able to talk with my mom about our days after dinner because I know I won’t have this little luxury after I move out”. Being intentional with your thoughts can truly make all the difference. I believe that being grateful for things in your life, can steer us into a direction of outpouring in others lives which can make you feel fulfilled.
- Moving your body- Even if it’s just for 30 minutes, moving your body is essential for your happiness!! I cannot emphasize this enough. I feel like Elle Woods from Legally Blonde “Exercise gives you endorphins and endorphins make you happy. Happy people just don’t kill their husbands.”. Whatever it is that you enjoy doing for getting your body moving (sports, dance, creative disciplines like yoga, structured gym movements) is worth it. Being active will make your body feel healthier and your mind more relaxed. I have made many lifestyle changes over the past year such as, changing what foods I eat, choosing what to drink/what not to drink, figuring out which pain relief methods work best for me, and the amount of movement I do a day (I think this will be whole other blog post), but all of these changes have helped me not only nourish my body but also, nurture my mindset. Through this, I allow myself the opportunity to believe in myself and love myself.
If I knew the person I was today by this time last year, I wouldn’t have believed it. Throughout the last year my life has changed so much and I have walked through this self-love journey radically. However, this is not to say that it wasn’t without strife, hard work, and perseverance through the bad days that didn’t exactly go my way. And my work is far from over, I still have quite a path ahead. I hope that some of this post resonates with you and you can takeaway some of these bullet points to start implementing in your own life if self-love is a journey you are walking on… I would love a walking buddy 😇. Tell me in the comments or message me @saraeliseblog on Instagram to let me know if you any of these have worked for you and what your experience has been. Thanks for reading and supporting my blog posts!
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